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Mary Indritz's avatar

The Ben Platt song is amazing...the video was distressing to me. Watching the male disappear and the female run after him made her feel desparate to me like there was not mutual growth or respect in that relationship. This is why I had a hard time with MTV when it came out (especially when I saw Meatball compared to his love songs, a definite disconnect for my limbic self).

I have been a Daytimer (dating myself) Steven Covey user for decades just for it's organization and still, despite no reason in the world, love to shop for school/organizing supplies each August. I still have the napkin I drew my business plan on because diagrams help me (and, yes, I diagram my errands so I am always turning right in the car as much as possible on my "circle" route). I taught our kids all of my tips and some stuck, some they laughed at, and some they have returned to. All in the name of feeling good at the end of the day.

Just like making the bed and straightening the bedroom and kitchen starts me off right. I put the living room to right before bed. I am a person who likes things in their places to feel settled. I totally get it - now I just need a playlist.

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Julie Lythcott-Haims's avatar

you know what, I had a similar thought when watching the video. i loved the dance moves but not the gender roles. it felt deeply problematic as a statement about hetero relationships but i decided to take gender out of it and see them just as people in a push and pull.

I absolutely loved the Franklin Planner before they merged with Covey even. are they still in business??

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Kathy Veit's avatar

Really enjoyed this pod. Our kiddo (finally) got diagnosed with ADHD at the beginning of this year. . . . It is a journey!

Hope you are well, particularly given the hard last week of May.

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Julie Lythcott-Haims's avatar

such a journey. did i see they are off to Europe or some such place?

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Heather Goodwin-Yu's avatar

Thanks for sharing. I’m also a visual learner, so appreciate your tips for color-coding your notebooks and each new note, etc. And, great work building a morning ritual with your son.

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Julie Lythcott-Haims's avatar

here's to us visuals, Heather. i didn't really 'know/get' this about myself until recently but it explains SO MUCH. do you have any morning rituals that are meaningful to you?

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Cindy's avatar

Sorry about your May. Mine sucked too ( my birthday month as well!). It’s June but the sucky thing isn’t over and won’t be anytime soon. Still I am hopeful my resilience will see me through. I hope for you as well.

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Julie Lythcott-Haims's avatar

So sorry you have a sucky thing going on that won't be over any time soon. Me too. Let's hold hands as we go 😊

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Kerri's avatar

I love everything about the cleaning song!

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Julie Lythcott-Haims's avatar

i'm so glad. as you can tell, it's become very special to me/us!

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Marika Páez Wiesen's avatar

Julie, so beautiful! So useful! So needed. ❤️

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Julie Lythcott-Haims's avatar

glad u liked!

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Mary Indritz's avatar

Thank you for prompting me to take out gender and rewatch it... it still did not feel healthy, especially in how you describe your relationship with Dan, which is something I wish upon my children. Our partnership formed to long into our own personal formations so we didn't grow together, though we grew through raising kids. We were just at different places at 36 and 42 years of age and are quite independent of each other; there are lists and minuses and I rather envy our friends who grew together despite our times of autonomy mixed with companionship.

Covey bought Franklim Planner and while I like they philosophy I'm not as attached to their pages, especially when I was working weekends and needed full columns where there were none. It's a Time and Newsweek problem - what you grew up with you gravitate towards.

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