I totally understand how you feel. I work in public schools and my daughter is in a public high school. I have joined all the groups, written letters to local and federal officials and I don’t see significant change. The only way I can continue to send my own child into a public school and to work there on a daily basis is to numb myself to the facts, data, and reality. Dealing with the facts and feeling the feels might literally terrorize me and prevent me from facing the reality of my situation.
I teach too and feel the same. If I didn’t numb myself, I wouldn’t be able to get up and go to work everyday or send my own kids to school. From micromanagement, over testing and fear of a school shooting, I find no joy in teaching anymore. I can’t wait to retire. I never thought I’d feel this way about a job I once loved. It’s sad.
I think that "inured" described my thoughts this past week. Julie, I had already had my baby son 4 months, when Columbine occurred. At that time, I had thought, "oh no, I won't send my son to public school! I'll figure a way to keep him out of that situation!" Finances dictated differently by the time he finished pre-K and Kindergarten in a private church school. We had found what we thought and found out was a decent school system. He graduated in 2017 from a public schools system. Luckily, no shootings occurred on campus, although I did hear from my son and the school of guns being brought on campus. Things like this didn't occur in the 60's -80's when I was in school. I just don't know what to say. Children should feel safe.
My parents' local grocery store was shot up by a disgruntled 20-year-old former employee with an AR rifle. Two people died, plus the shooter. It was a Sunday in America, so this was barely a blip on the national news. It was last summer. My parents are in their mid-80s. They shop there. Mom uses a walker. Dad shuffles slowly. Every Saturday morning, a van from their assisted living building takes a load of their neighbors to shop. They can't run. They can't "hit the deck" with their artificial knees--at least not very fast. And it was pure luck that they weren't at the Safeway that day. There are armed guards now at all hours. And none of us are safe from the next one--at movie theaters, churches, schools, concerts, bars, nightclubs, county fairs, farmer's markets, and someone's local Safeway. And I can't dwell on it or I'll go mad. So we all keep trudging along.
i wish there was a better emoji for this than a heart. what i'm feeling in response to what you've shared is anguish and compassion. i feel it too. i've decided i'm going to continue to live my life and if i get shot doing something i enjoy then at least i can say i was living rather than cowering in fear in my house. but the kids at school, man, life has barely just begun for them. how can this be a normal facet of life for them? active shooter drills as a routine part of childhood?
I’m horrified and grieve for these families. Again and again. My daughter is in a small elementary school that is fenced in and (hopefully) somewhat safe. But who knows what tomorrow will bring. And then high school. AND we live in Florida. FUCK this John Wayne country, this fucking patriarchy. (Sorry, I’m angry too.)
How sad that our guns are more important to us than our children.
Susan
inane
cruel
self-defeating
wrong
i could go on.
I totally understand how you feel. I work in public schools and my daughter is in a public high school. I have joined all the groups, written letters to local and federal officials and I don’t see significant change. The only way I can continue to send my own child into a public school and to work there on a daily basis is to numb myself to the facts, data, and reality. Dealing with the facts and feeling the feels might literally terrorize me and prevent me from facing the reality of my situation.
I teach too and feel the same. If I didn’t numb myself, I wouldn’t be able to get up and go to work everyday or send my own kids to school. From micromanagement, over testing and fear of a school shooting, I find no joy in teaching anymore. I can’t wait to retire. I never thought I’d feel this way about a job I once loved. It’s sad.
i'm so sorry its like this for you and for everyone.
i am so sorry you're having to deal with this. the way you're describing it is so clear, so frank. thank you for sharing.
I think that "inured" described my thoughts this past week. Julie, I had already had my baby son 4 months, when Columbine occurred. At that time, I had thought, "oh no, I won't send my son to public school! I'll figure a way to keep him out of that situation!" Finances dictated differently by the time he finished pre-K and Kindergarten in a private church school. We had found what we thought and found out was a decent school system. He graduated in 2017 from a public schools system. Luckily, no shootings occurred on campus, although I did hear from my son and the school of guns being brought on campus. Things like this didn't occur in the 60's -80's when I was in school. I just don't know what to say. Children should feel safe.
i know. it's just... wrong. like the universe inside out. like ... WHAT and HOW ARE WE THE PEOPLE LETTING THIS HAPPEN, SEEMINGLY POWERLESS
My parents' local grocery store was shot up by a disgruntled 20-year-old former employee with an AR rifle. Two people died, plus the shooter. It was a Sunday in America, so this was barely a blip on the national news. It was last summer. My parents are in their mid-80s. They shop there. Mom uses a walker. Dad shuffles slowly. Every Saturday morning, a van from their assisted living building takes a load of their neighbors to shop. They can't run. They can't "hit the deck" with their artificial knees--at least not very fast. And it was pure luck that they weren't at the Safeway that day. There are armed guards now at all hours. And none of us are safe from the next one--at movie theaters, churches, schools, concerts, bars, nightclubs, county fairs, farmer's markets, and someone's local Safeway. And I can't dwell on it or I'll go mad. So we all keep trudging along.
i wish there was a better emoji for this than a heart. what i'm feeling in response to what you've shared is anguish and compassion. i feel it too. i've decided i'm going to continue to live my life and if i get shot doing something i enjoy then at least i can say i was living rather than cowering in fear in my house. but the kids at school, man, life has barely just begun for them. how can this be a normal facet of life for them? active shooter drills as a routine part of childhood?
I’m horrified and grieve for these families. Again and again. My daughter is in a small elementary school that is fenced in and (hopefully) somewhat safe. But who knows what tomorrow will bring. And then high school. AND we live in Florida. FUCK this John Wayne country, this fucking patriarchy. (Sorry, I’m angry too.)